this morning i stumbled out of bed and crawled under a blanket on the couch with my phone to check the "news." there was a desperate cry out, dare i say shriek, from a boy for his mommy in the dark hours before dawn. i cramped myself onto the edge of his twin bed and reached to comfort him in the midst of his nightmare. he clamped his arm down on mine. i was trapped. it was all i could think about. my hand stuck in his armpit. i started to slowly relax the muscles in my hand so that it would be easier to remove when i made a break for it. then a little prayer came to mind as i watched the muscles on his face start to relax.
Lord, please let me be in this moment and not moving on to the next. please let me love and be there for him, right now, as he needs me. please help me to appreciate this moment and the comfort i can give to him. let me focus on and remember the smell of his sweet breath as he starts to calm down. let me remember how soft his face is as we lay here forehead to forehead and his eyes start to close. let me savor in all the ways you have made me a mom to this boy who still needs me when he's scared. please let me remember these sweet moments in the early morning before i'm distracted by everything else. Amen.
and this is what you get when i wake up and check the news before i sit down to write. a distraction. a whisper. a prayer. and a blog post.
Very sweet post. I still remember when the kids would have a nightmare and I'd hear their little footsteps running to our room and then hear those words, "Can I snuggle with you?" Those days passed and now I look at my two face to face as adults, but those memories? They're not going anywhere.
ReplyDeletethanks, anne. glad to know you're still reading. as always, thanks for the encouragement!
DeleteI'm so happy that you find it in every beat of your heart to give thanks for your blessings-Mom
ReplyDelete